"An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips." Proverbs 24:26
Protecting your spouse's confidence in your relationship is critical to building a healthy marriage. Striving to be a trustworthy spouse is easily achieved when we keep our mouths shut when the gossip train comes into the station.
All of us, when we are with a friend or gathered with a group of our friends, talk about our marriages. I learned early on that if you have nothing good to say about someone then say nothing at all. And if you want to join in on a conversation where others are picking their spouses to pieces (negatively) then you can be the catalyst in turning around a 'beat up the husband sesh' by adding in something positive about your husband.
You see, the more you labor and fume over his flaws, the more it highlights and keeps them in the forefront of your mind. Dwelling on something that is out of your control makes it that much harder to overlook.
So if your conversation starts with, "I probably shouldn't be telling you this but..." or "He would kill me if he knew I told you this..." or maybe even, "You won't tell him I mentioned this, will you?" then it's probably a good idea to take a step back and consider what you're about to say.
"Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to." (1 Tim. 5:13)
Gossip, no doubt about it, is evil. Paul warns about the destructive power of gossip and the condemnation that comes to "gossips and busybodies". A lot of times this doesn't stop a gossip. They don't even realize the damage they are doing to themselves, their spouse and their marriage. Just think of the remarkable energy that would be restored to their marriage if they could practice discretion.
I want Dana to know without a doubt I have his back. I want to lift him up and never bring him down in others' eyes. None of us are perfect. If we keep our eyes on ourselves and work at being the perfect marriage partner then all marriages will have a fighting chance.
I love you & He loves you more!
Lord, Help me to be an encourager to Dana to his face and behind his back. Forgive me when I have made his light dim in the presence of others. Cleanse my heart so there is no deception there. In Jesus' name. Amen.